Yesterday, I wrote a little recap on what I have *done* in 2013.
Today, I want to offer a brief reflection on what I have *learned* in 2013.
1. It's good to take risks. When I quit my church job back in February, I had *nothing* to fall back on. There was no job offer. There was no call for a job interview. Heck, I had not even put in a job application. All I had was a sense of calling and some money saved up and a far-gone crazy hope that maybe, just maybe there will be a job for me in the right time.
Sure enough, seven weeks after my departure from the church, I was walking into a brand new job at Christian Community Health Fellowship that, funny enough, utilized none of my professional training. But hey, it was a job that kept the bills paid.
If you had told me that working for CCHF would indirectly lead to a job with The Marin Foundation, then I would have called you crazy. And yet, this is exactly what happened when my boss at CCHF said to me in June, "Look, you're great, we love you, you're doing a good job - but you're not happy here. You need to be working to build bridges of reconciliation with the LGBT community. Our one conversation in the car from Atlanta helped me so much."
I kid you not - my boss at CCHF told me those words.
One week before I would go to Chicago.
To hang out with The Marin Foundation staff.
Who, as it turned out, were waiting for me to make a commitment to them.
Funny how risks can play out like that.
2. The familiar can become unfamiliar. Case in point - the Bible. Last January, I got on a Bible-in-a-year plan, and as of this publication, I'm four chapters away from finishing Revelation - the final book of the Scriptures. Passages that were, at one time, very familiar have now become a rich treasury of mystery and, yes, frustration. I still don't quite get all the violent bloodshed of the Old Testament. Jesus and Paul said some very hard things, and I'm not sure how *literally* I'm supposed to take them (Romans 9? Matthew 25? I Corinthians 6?).
3. The familiar can still be familiar. Case in point - the Bible. I stumbled across words - some familiar, some obscure - that struck deep chords in my heart. Psalm 73 is the song of a conflicted, burdened man whose hope rests in the Living God. Malachi 3:1-4 reminds me that I'm not a finished product - the best is yet to come. Romans 8? There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus? Amen. John 8: I do not condemn you either - you are free to live *well*. Psalm 139: you are fearfully and wonderfully made.
4. I get to keep learning. I'm going to start anew that same Bible-in-a-year curriculum. There's too much buried in those texts for me to simply close the Scriptures right now; I am convinced that the Holy Spirit has much more to teach me from the Bible. And as for myself, my being, my body, my mind, my identity - I'm asking myself huge questions. What does it mean to be a Christian? Who is God? What has God made me to be? What does it mean to be a man? What does it mean to be gay? I look forward to engaging those questions in 2014.
5. Time is so short. You only get so many hours a day and days a year, and I wasted more than enough time on things that just don't matter.
On arguments that don't end.
On relationships that have died.
On grudges that wear me down.
On a past that can't be changed.
On people who don't build me up.
Wasted time burdens the spirit. And in the words of a great prophet of YouTube this summer - H'aint nobody got time fo dat!
I've only begun to understand that you have to manage your time well in order to manage your well being. Calendars and rituals can help you spend more time on what's important.
On conversations that illuminate.
On relationships that thrive.
On laughter and joy and peace and forgiveness.
On a present that only exists for the moment.
On people who build me up.
So now what? 2014 is only a few hours away. On Thursday, I'll share with you my resolution for the new year, but in the meantime, I hope that you all ring out the old and ring in the new with loved ones tonight!
What did *you* learn in 2013?